The Whole Truth

Wow. Crazy. I was having a mediocre day yesterday, mostly involving tax studying and watching the Riders get hammered, but there was reason to be hopeful for the evening. Given everything that happened, that hope should have turned into a disaster, but remarkably, it didn't. It still worked out, despite the fact that basically everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. So here's the list.

1. My attempt to provide a reason for acting, when there was really no need for a reason turned into me looking like I was about 16 and had no idea what I was doing
2. The beauty of Linux and the Internet
3. My unfortunate track-hack
4. The fact that someone did a poor job of the dishes
5. Paper-thin walls
6. The Kitchen
7. Fingernails, the bane of my existence
8. An unlikely coincidence and a classic problem
9. Ronnie Hawkins
10.Kleenex

I can't believe it. 10 things wrong (Plus the Riders, 11), one thing very right.

Sailing to Philadelphia

This post is gonna be a list of places I've been and places I want to go during my lifetime. I've been considering where I could get to in the next few years if I plan things right, and thought I should figure out all the places I want to go. Nothing will ever beat Alberta and Saskatchewan, but I think some of these places would be awesome! I havent included anywhere in Canada on these lists..I've been to every province except Newfoundland, but there are still some domestic destinations that would be neat.

Places I've Been (The ones that would be on this list if I hadn't already been there)

Los Angeles, California
Orlando, Florida
Honolulu, Hawaii
Cancun, Mexico
Puerto Vallarta, Mexico
Sydney, Australia
Perth, Australia
London, England
Tijuana, Mexico
San Diego, California
Eugene, Oregon
Alaska
Suva, Fiji

Places I Want To Go (That I haven't been yet)

New York, New York
Washington, DC
Belize
Cuzco, Peru
Rapa Nui, Chile
Buenos Aires, Argentina
Rio de Janiero, Brazil
Tahiti, French Polynesia
Maui, Hawaii
New Zealand
Tasmania, Australia
Singapore
Hong Kong, China
Beijing, China
Taipei, Taiwan
Tokyo, Japan
Mecca, Saudi Arabia
Dubai, United Arab Emirates
Jerusalem, Israel
Agra, India
Giza, Egypt
Mauritius
Madagascar
South Africa
Kenya
Moscow, Russia
Oslo, Norway
Berlin, Germany
Athens, Greece
Istanbul, Turkey
Prague, Czech Republic
Munich, Germany
Vienna, Austria
Rome, Italy
Venice, Italy
Litchenstein
Switzerland
Monaco
Paris/Versailles, France
Amsterdam, Netherlands
Madrid, Spain
Barcelona, Spain
Lisbon, Portugal
Edinburgh, Scotland
Cardiff, Wales
Dublin, Ireland
Reykjavik, Iceland
Azores, Portugal
Casablanca, Morocco
Brussels, Belgium
Antartica
Jamaica

And probably more that I can't think of. I best get to it, the list is long! Onward!

X for II

It's been two years since I first sat down at this computer and decided to start a blog. I had seen Vincci's and thought that it might be an easier alternative to the various journals and diaries that I had written over the years. It was certainly more university-like, or at least I thought so at the time. Over those two years, I have changed, and the blog has changed. At first I was not entirely sure what I wanted to write here, and the posts, modelled after Vincci's, were mostly recounts of mundane events, with a little bit of extra analysis thrown in. As I became more comfortable with the blogging environment, I began to write posts that were more like what i had previously written in journals. They were personal, convoluted and mostly about girls. Over time, this blog changed again, into what I believe it to be now.
It all started back in Philosophy 200, where I started seeing connections between different essays that i had been writing. I saw that my theories on Philosophy connected with my political and moral beliefs as well. I wondered to myself if someday I could write a book, a treatise if you like, that included all my opinions and views, forged into a coherent whole, an expression of my worldview. I told myself at the time that I would only have the opportunity to do something like that if I ended up being famous and had a chance to write memoirs. However, as second year progressed, I realized, that with no history, polisci or philosophy courses, I no longer had a forum to present my ideas. That bothered me, and I started looking for a solution.
I also noticed around the same time that the entries in this blog were starting to be a little bit redundant. They were personal, vague and more than a little melodramatic. That's all well and good if only I am going to be reading them, but I realized that this blog has a dual purpose. As well as being a place for my personal reflection, it is a way for me to speak to an audience, even if it's a small one, and that I should structure my posts in such a way that they do not lose their internal value but are more interesting for an outside audience to read.
After a while, I realized that all these issues could be resolved through this blog. It could become my treatise, my Empire of Ideas (the title I concieved for my hypothetical book in Phil 200). That is what I hope to make it in the long run, a complete, or at least extensive, collection on my morals, beliefs, experiences(still room for melodrama), theories, political views and my goals. That would allow it to achieve its dual purpose, being a "frontier" for personal development and also being (hopefully) engaging and interesting to read for an outside audience. As always, I welcome ideas on this topic. I would like to end, as I often do, with a list. This one is of the ten posts that I consider to be my best. They are the the most illuminating, the best written, the most creative, the ones that answered the most questions, and most of all, the ones I am most proud of writing over the last two years.

I. Assumptions [9/05]
II. The Altar of Freedom [8/06]
III. A Star Wars Kinda Mood [3/05]
IV. A Kingdom of Conscience [10/05]
V. Man of Science, Man of Faith [1/06]
VI. A More Civilized Age [7/06]
VII. Golden Heart [8/06]
VIII. Interesting People A-Z [10/04]
IX. Speechless [3/05]
X. Playing In The Big Leagues [4/05]

Phantasms

I realized the other day, with a little help from a friend, something interesting about myself. She asked me what was the thing I had done that I most regretted. I had no answer for her. I have never done anything that I regret to the extent that it still haunts me. She also asked whether I regretted having NOT done something. That list isn't as empty. It isn't long but there are are a few entries. My friend suggested that this perhaps indicated that I need to take some more chances. It isn't that I want to regret things that I've done, but I think that list should be the same length as things you regret not doing. If you can have two empty lists, so much the better, but I think that is a rare thing. I started thinking about it, and came to a brick wall. I don't want to do anything that is obviously going to turn out badly, that would just be stupid. There is no point in doing something you know you will regret for that reason alone. I am having trouble trying to think of things that are a little less..cautious..than my usual activities but still harbour a good opportunity for payoff. I'm a finance student, I have to look for things where the risk is proportional to the return. So far I haven't thought of much. I've asked a few people over the last few days, and the jist of their answers has been, "You'll know when you come to it." I thought that was an interesting response, but I think it is only partially true. Some of my "phantasms" that never were didn't materialize even though I realized the alternative existed. I made a clear choice not to do something and now, I wish I had taken the other path. Others, however, wern't a concious choice at the time. I didn't take the risk because I didn't realize that the opportunity was there, or I didn't realize that I could have chosen to do things differently. Frosh Week is a good example. I knew nothing about it going in, and although it was fun, I feel like I missed out on part of the Frosh experience. If I could have my Frosh week over again, I would have done things a bit differently. So, it seems that I need to, in addition to considering more closely some alternative courses of action, become better at identifying situations where there might be a choice with a higher risk profile, but with correspondingly higher returns. I have constructed a short list of actions that I might have an opportunity to try out some of these theories on, but as I said earlier, most of them at this point are superficial. I am also planning to give some thought to those situations where I didn't realize there was a choice and why I failed to see it at the time. Much of it has to do with imcomplete information, but I think more analysis is required. I want to end with some song lyrics, because I don't know where else to put them. This song is one of my all-time favorites, and I've been listening to it alot lately. It is number 8 on my all-time list, but like others in the top 10, notably Timeless Love, it reached the top ten for one reason and later became relevant to me in other ways as well, redefining itself while retaining everything that made it great in the first place. It presented a bit of a problem though, because I usually like to title posts including song lyrics with the title of the song. Alas, I already have a post called The Fire Inside. So it gets stuck in here, as it has provided me lots of musical enjoyment and food for thought while I've been pondering life recently, and exploring the issues in this post.

There's a hard moon rising on the streets tonight
There's a reckless feeling in your heart as you head out tonight
Through the concrete canyons to the midtown lights
Where the latest neon promises are burning bright

Past the open windows on the darkened streets
Where unseen angry voices flash and children cry
Past the phony posers with their worn out lines
The tired new money dressed to the nines
The low life dealers with their bad designs
And the dilettantes with their open minds

You're out on the town, safe in the crowd
Ready to go for the ride
Searching the eyes, looking for clues
Theres no way you can hide
The Fire Inside

Well you've been to the clubs and the discotheques
Where they deal one another from the bottom of a deck of promises
Where the cautious loners and emotional wrecks
Do an acting stretch as a way to hide the obvious
And the lights go down and they dance real close
And for one brief instant they pretend they're safe and warm

Then the beat gets louder and the mood is gone
The darkness scatters as the lights flash on
They hold one another just a little too long
And they move apart and then move on

On to the street, on to the next
Safe in the knowledge that they tried
Faking the smile, hiding the pain
Never satisfied
The Fire Inside
Fire Inside

Now the hour is late and he thinks you're asleep
You listen to him dress and you listen to him leave
Like you knew he would
You hear his car pull away in the street
Then you move to the door and you lock it when
He's gone for good

Then you walk to the window and stare at the moon
Riding high and lonesome through a starlit sky
And it comes to you how it all slips away
Youth and beauty are gone one day
No matter what you dream or feel or say
It ends in dust and disarray

Like wind on the plains, sand through the glass
Waves rolling in with the tide
Dreams die hard and we watch them erode
But we cannot be denied
The Fire Inside

(Awesome Piano Solo)

The Silver Screen

Movies are one of my favorite things. There is little better than sitting down in front of a terrific film with a good friend or two and some hot popcorn. Of all the movies I've seen, there have been a few that have stuck with me. Some of them have made me think and examine the way I look at the world. Some have inspired me and spurred me on toward a myriad of possible futures. Some have had that rare ability to reach inside and stir my soul. Some have shown me men of profound character, and have shown me what it is that makes a man virtuous. Finally, some have just been brilliantly entertaining diversions for times when I've just want to be whisked away from reality for a little while. Here is the list, with the rottentomatoes aggregate ratings in brackets, so you can all see how mainstream I am.

Blair’s 25 Favorite Movies

1. Chariots of Fire (92%)
2. The Empire Strikes Back (98%)
3. Casablanca (97%)
4. Star Wars (94%)
5. The Lion King (92%)
6. The Wrath of Khan (96%)
7. Without Limits (76%)
8. Gladiator (78%)
9. Lord of the Rings* (95%)
10. Return of the Jedi (80%)
11. The Matrix (88%)
12. The Silence of the Lambs (97%)
13. Prefontaine (73%)
14. The Emperor’s Club (51%)
15. Spaceballs (50%)
16. Kill Bill* (85%)
17. Goldeneye (83%)
18. Raiders of the Lost Ark (97%)
19. Air Force One (77%)
20. The Last Waltz (97%)
21. Dodgeball (69%)
22. Wedding Crashers (75%)
23. Good Night, and Good Luck (94%)
24. V for Vendetta (76%)
25. Generations (48%)


* These two were multiple films, but intended to be viewed as a whole, therefore I have included them as such

Honorable Mentions: Top Gun, The Notebook, Terminator 2, The Last Crusade, A Beautiful Mind, Desperado, Hearts in Atlantis, Hidalgo, Jurassic Park, Braveheart and Predator

Golden Heart

This song is absolutely amazing. In the space of three months, it has gone from being the unknown title track on my newest CD, to being one of my favorite songs from that album, to being one of those songs I get obsessed with and listen to 24/7, to grabbing a spot on my Top 25 of the 90's list, to making the jump onto my Top 25 all-time, to rising to #6 on that same list. It is by far the newest (to me) of the songs in my top 10, and after listening to it non-stop for three months it still grabs me, it still makes me want to sing along, it still conveys a feeling of tremendous passion and elegance and it still takes me away. To Carolina if you will.
I am strongly considering moving it up from #6, but to crack the top 5 it will have to contend with five songs I have loved since junior high, five songs which mean an awful lot to me.

1. Timeless Love, is, at least for now, untouchable at the top of my list. It is my favorite song by my favorite artist, and every time I listen to it (approaching 800 plays on my computer alone) I can still feel the tremendous emotion in the song, especially in the live version, where you can just hear Burton pouring everything he has into his voice and his piano. For a long time, I thought Timeless Love was about two people who loved each other, and yet by circumstance were torn apart. To me, they were apart, but still in love. Then one day I sent the file over to Jackie so she could listen to it. She remarked that the song was terribly sad. I had never seen it that way before. When I went to see Burton live, I found out that Jackie was right. I knew it the instant he started talking about the song. You could tell that he truly feels everything he sings about in those lyrics. He said, "I haven't played this song in a long time. We got it out especially for this tour." There was something in his voice just then, maybe I was imagining it, but it seemed to me just a hint of...anguish in his voice. I thought..maybe, just maybe it's the one I want to hear. He continued, "This song is about a girl in Winnipeg who broke my heart a long time ago." Then I knew. It was indeed my favorite song of all. Then Burton said, "Is she here tonight? Is she here? (Pause) I guess not." That was the bit that hit home. He sounded so hopeful, so excited when it occured to him that this girl, who had broken his heart forty years before, might have come to see him play. Anyway, I sang along as loud as I wanted, and that, singing along with Burton Cummings to Timeless Love, was one of those elusive moments of perfection. Since then Timeless Love has made more sense to me, and I have understood why it is my very favorite song. It is a testament to tremendous happiness and undying love even in the face of crushing despair. Despite everything, love prevails over darkness. That's why.

2. Carolina in my Mind is the ultimate escape song. It is #2 on my list because I think it is James Taylor's most beautiful song, masterfully crafted and sung and no matter where I am or what is going on, it takes me away to my Carolina. The song provides me tremedous clarity, bacause in times of stress or disappointment it reminds me of my perfect world, the world I imagine and strive toward. It reminds me of what I am working towards. The imagery in the song is stunning, I really can see the silver sunshine on dark winter nights. "Watch her watch the morning come, a silver tear appearing now.." gives me a crystal clear image of something I hope to see in the future. The song describes itself beautifully with the line, "Whisper something soft and kind.." That's what it does. It's a whisper reminding you what you consider most valuable.

3. My Own Way to Rock reaches #3 because it is very much a song that defines me. I remember reading the "500 Greatest Songs" article in Rolling Stone a while back, and noticing something in the way they described The Who's My Generation. The words they used were "The Who's immortal fuck-off to their elders". In the same way, My Own Way to Rock is my answer to people who think they know how to run my life better than I do. I welcome debate, criticism and suggestions, and honestly do take them into consideration, but at the end I will be the one to decide how I live my life. Some people won't like it but I don't care. If I want to write melodramatic garbage in this blog then I will. If I don't want to do something, then I won't. If I want to believe in something then I will. And as the song says, "I've got my own way to rock, I've got my own way to roll, and when you're walkin' that walk it's good for your soul". That's the main thing that got this song to #3, but there are some other contributing factors as well. Again, Burton outdoes himself in this song. The way he sings it, the drawn out syllables, the random piano stuff, the added sentences that don't make sense, it all speaks to someone who's having a lot of fun singing this song. Even the album version has the feel of a live version to it. That sheer passion never fails to produce a smile from me. Finally, the song includes perhaps my favorite piano solo in all of music (Its only challengers coming at the end of Bob Seger's The Fire Inside and from a couple other Burton songs). The skill is incredible, and when I saw it live and he drew it out (It's a tad short in the album version) it was simply amazing.

4. Something in the Way She Moves is at #4 because it was the first song I can remember that really meant something to me. I think I was about 10 years old, not even close to the age where girls became cool, and the James Taylor Greatest Hits CD was in the CD player of my dad's car. I remember listening to it and thinking, even then, that's the kind of girl I'm going to marry. The line, "It isn't what she's got to say, but how she thinks, the way she's been. To me the words are nice the way they sound.." was the line that stuck with me. Ironically, I didn't much like Carolina in My Mind at the time, I would always skip from this song, Track 1, to Fire and Rain, Track 3, and miss Carolina, Track 2. This song was my favorite James Taylor and my favorite love song for most of junior high, and I will always hold it in the highest regard.

5. Truly, Madly, Deeply is #5 because it is the purest love song I know. If you were to ask me what love is, I couldn't give you a better answer than Savage Garden does in this song. It is #1 on my Top 25 Love Songs, as it should be. I think that when I meet a girl who is accurately described by this song, that'll be the girl I want to marry. As long as she's cool with it. lol.

So, as you can see, Golden Heart has some work to do if it's going to crack the top 5. I think the key is that I couldn't yet tell you what it is exactly that I love about Golden Heart. I know some things, but I couldn't give you a definative answer as I have done with the current top 5. I think it will take more time to do that. Then maybe it will have a chance of getting somewhere between 2 and 5. It's a great song, but I can't see it having the strength to dislodge Timeless Love. I'll finish with the lyrics, as I usually do when the post title is a song title.

Golden Heart

She was swinging by the bangles in a main street store
A while before we met
The most dangerous angles that you ever saw
She spied her amulet

And she took a loop of leather for around her neck
And that was then the start
The most dangerous lady on her quarter deck
She found her Golden Heart
You found your Golden Heart

Then we swirled around each other, and the thread was spun
To some Arcadian band
I would stop it from swinging like a pendulum
Just to hold time in my hand

And you shot me with a cannonball of history
A long forgotten art
I'd be turning it over as our words ran free
I'd hold your Golden Heart
I'd hold your Golden Heart

Nothing in the world prepared me for your heart, your heart
Nothing in the world that I love more your heart, your heart
Your Golden Heart

And every time I'm thinking of you from a distant shore
And all the time I sleep
I will have a reminder that my baby wore
A part of you to keep

And I'll send you all my promises across the sea
And while we are apart
I will carry the wonder that you gave to me
I'll wear your Golden Heart
I'll wear your Golden Heart

Nothing in the world prepared me for your heart, your heart
Nothing in the world that I love more your heart, your heart
Your Golden Heart

Introspection

Having written my last three posts on very big issues, I felt like it was a good time to go back and write a more personal post. Personal post. That's a little bit of a paradox, isn't it? I am, and have been for the last several years, a very open person. The way I think demands that I rationalize my beliefs and actions. Consequently, I have no qualms about telling people almost anything they want to know. If I can rationalize something to myself I should be able to rationalize it to others, and therefore my life is pretty much an open book. I also realize that debate is perhaps the best way to refine your own beliefs, identify flaws in your reasoning, and to make yourself a better person. My great hope for the last three posts I have written is that someone will read them and challenge me on aspects of them. The ensuing debate would be tremendously valuable to me. However, recently I have been wondering whether I am a little too open. I have realized that anyone, even someone who doesn't know me, could carefully read my facebook profile and this blog, both of which are publicly and universally available, and they could really understand who I am. Not just superficially either, but the real Blair. A total stranger could get a sense of who I am at my core. I feel as if other people have this exterior persona, the thing that I see from my friends, the things they write on their facebook profiles, their interests and what they do, their personality etc. But almost all of them, and in my closer friends I see hints, have this carefully guarded "core self" that they rarely show to anyone. It contains their emotions and motivations, and what they truly believe. I don't think I have that. Actually that isn't true, I do have it, but the range of what it encompasses is very small, there are only a very few topics on which I would deflect questions and avoid discussions. My "core self" will never be shown to anyone except the woman I love. Therefore, I think I a missing a layer. I am missing the layer containing beliefs, thoughts and emotions which many people keep reasonably private, sharing perhaps only with a couple trusted family members or best friends. I know this middle layer exists, from conversations I have had with people. Trent has it, Lyndsey has it and Larissa had it. Those three are the best examples because in those cases I felt like I've seen a little bit of it, just the very tip of the iceberg before the vault slammed shut. In other cases too, I have been able to tell that the wall exists, even with people I know less well. I have seen it in many of my friends, but didn't realize what it was until I observed it crystal-clear in Hayleigh. I am not sure whether this wall is a "middle layer" as I have guessed, a section revealed to a very few but still distinct from people's deepest selves, or whether the deepest selves of others just encompass a much wider range and are perhaps a little more easily accessable than mine. The latter hypothesis is given credence by the examples of Amit and Vincci, both of whom I believe have an ethos more similar to mine. In both cases, however, I think what they keep hidden is more, if only slightly, than what I do. The question that comes out of this is this: Do I need to be a little more introspective and keep my inner motivations a little more secret? The reason I think this might be advantageous is that it keeps people guessing. There has to be effort in order to discover who I really am. It keeps others involved and you aren't as boring that way. You can seem more spontaneous, because people are less able to discern your motivations. It gives you a bit on an air of mystery, and gives others the feeling that if they want to be privy to your secrets they will have to earn it.It also protects you in some instances. Bassil said something to me about this once, and for all his faults, this was something that made me think a little bit. He was referring to a situation in which I got burned, and was pretty upset about it. So what did I do? I told the person who had hurt me exactly what I felt. Everything. I let her have it. Bassil was of the mind that I should not have told her, and that telling her conveyed an image of weakness and emotional fragility which in turn caused me long-run problems. Although I don't agree entirely with him on this, he does raise a few good points. I will have to think more about this topic, but I feel like I may try to be a little more introspective in the next little while and see if I like the results.

The Silent Visage

Monday night was a great conversation, as previously mentioned. It's been a while since I had a good long conversation, where anything goes. I had forgotten the simple joys of uninhibited discourse. I learned a lot, about myself as well as about others. It was odd though. I've had similar conversations before with women and all of them have turned out one of two ways. Either one person or the other has been let down by the revelations of the conversation, or we've ended up making out. I guess this time was an exception. Maybe it was just indifference on one or both of our parts. I feel like it was because I didnt get a reaction as I have in the past. All I got was so much matter-of-factness that I may as well have been talking to a vulcan. lol. I dont think that is a bad thing, it is just intriguing. Never have I been so hopelessly unable to gauge an emotional response when talking about something as blatant as what we thought of each other. Maybe there wasn't one and that's why. But even if a girl I was totally indifferent about said what was said, I would most certainly betray something, even if it was only my indifference. Maybe that's why it was so easy to speak candidly, because I was less afraid of being judged. The initial rush was still there, when the tide of the conversation turned I certainly revelled in the anticipation, but at the moment that is usually the moment of judgement, where you discern the other's true intentions, the emotional level just flatlined as if we were talking about what we had for breakfast. The rest of the conversation was great too, and the second major thing that intrigued me was why it was so easy to talk about all this stuff. I am pretty open about my opinions, but that was the kind of conversation I would have with Lyndz or Trent or Amit. Completley open. Given the length of time that we've been "friends," per se, that was strange. She mentioned that she is an easy person to talk to, but the question is why. I hinted above that it is partially because she seems like she won't judge but I'm not sure that's all of it. It could also have something to do with us being kindred spirits in some sense. For example, her enjoyment of list-making allowed my to freely confess all my normally too-nerdy-to-talk-about list making adventures. Similarly, discovering that she once owned TIE Fighter made me much more able to talk about my sci-fi based nerdiness. Maybe talking about those interests, which I usually moderate except for the sake of humour in normal conversation, established a level of trust more quickly than usual and allowed the free exchange of information to move to other areas. I also think it had something to do with genuinely believing in the confidentiality of the conversation. My usual assumption is that if I say something to someone, usually it will find its way into the domain of general knowledge. There are only a few people with whom I trust information I would rather not have generally known. In this case, even though my gut feeling was not to say some of the things I said, I felt like what I said, even the things that might have been a little mean or off-colour, were in safe hands. I may be proven wrong in the future, but that would just be so..unlike her. I think. As mentioned, she's a tough one to read. I suppose that's another reason why it was such a good conversation. I don't really have a clear sense of who she really is at her core. Over the years I think I've seen a lot of different faces, and so she remains somewhat of an engima. From this angle the conversation was intriguing in the same way as a well-played game of bridge (which I have been trying to teach myself recently). I would play a question, and observe the reaction in an attempt to discern the hand she was holding. It wasn't easy, but that's what made it so fun. Overall the exercise wasn't a success, although there were some hints, her fundamental self still remains a bit of a mystery. It will be a great challenge to continue. I know that will sound strange because I have previously attested to the openness of the conversation, and it may seem paradoxical that I was stymied from this angle. However, the factual openness of the conversation contrasted with, at least on her side, an extremely well-fortified wall defending her emotions and motivations. It wasn't something that could be solved by "Ask me anything." because there wasn't a question that I could have asked, other than, "what are you feeling right now?" which would have been somewhat of a strange thing to say I think. I must confess that one of the ulterior motives of this post is to furthur this line of inquiry. Anyhow...that was the conversation that was monday night. A truly terrific bit of wordsmithing. Hopefully it isn't the last.

The Long Road

This post is supposed to be about long-distance relationships and whether I think they are viable or not. I'm not sure if that's what it's going to end up being about, but that's where I'll start. Having two "homes" for at least the next two years means that unless I end up swearing off women, which is unlikely, that I have a fair chance of ending up in one of these situations. I used to think that long distance relationships were silly and impractical, but since I have gotten to know people who have dealt with said relationships I feel as if I have moderated my position. That said, I still feel like you should never enter into any sort of long-distance thing without a certain commitment. People often say that for long-distance to be viable, some substantial groundwork has to already have been laid in the relationship. I don't entirely agree with that, in the sense that you have to have been dating for a long time. Obviously you can't decide when you fall for someone, that's up to fate. I think that the prerequisite for a long-distance relationship is mutual willingness to commit to the timeframe. You don't have a LDR for it's own sake, the idea is that at some point it will no longer be an LDR. For example, if I were to start dating a girl now, we would both have to be quite sure that we would be willing to date the other person for a minimum of 9 months, plus some time to actually reap the fruit next summer. I think it is difficult for people to internally commmit to a lengthy time frame such as that on short notice, but it certainly isn't infeasable. Larissa and I were only good friends for two months or so before summer, and should the opportunity have been afforded me then, I would have been willing to commit for quite a length of time. In that particular case I knew after only a couple weeks. I think cases like that are rare, and it is rarer still for it to be reciprocated, but my point is that the time you know someone beforehand is not as important of a factor as some might think. As in any relationship, the key to an LDR is trust. It is even more of a key in that case. LDR's will not work unless both the people have complete trust in the other's fidelity. This, I have observed, is the downfall of many LDR's. The second key factor is communication. In an LDR, communication is key to maintainting a strong bond. Probably 90% of the LDR's I have observed have either succeeded(to this point), or failed bacause of one of those two factors. I guess my conclusion here is that in my case, for the next two years, if I find myself in a potential LDR, 100% trust and 100% communication have to be deal-breakers. They both are already important and are in the top 10 on the test, but there is a difference between the levels of trust and communication I would normally require and the 100% that I believe is neccesary to an LDR. Speaking of communication, I had a great conversation yesterday which I feel derserves some words, but since it is on a totally different topic, I feel like it needs its own post. Maybe I'll do two posts in one day (woah) or maybe I'll wait till tomorrow. We'll see if work picks up here. Plus I have to think of a good title. Coming up with post titles that encompass the content is one of my favorite parts of blogging. The next post will need a good one.

Playoff Time!

"Here lies a city's heart.
There in her hill lie
her green bones.
Quiet under the clutter
of houses and streets.
And there, in her rivers
run her veins
That long ago
powered her mills.
Her long limbs reach
to the moors
But
Here. Here lies
her throbbing heart"

Calgary's heart is beating faster.
We're ready.
Go Flames Go!